Powerhouse Nucleus

Year of the Fire Horse: art inspires art, and people inspire people. As I trust in myself deeply at home every day, I’m finding that magic is more powerful than we could have imagined together. Imagining core-wise within makes Truth far more obvious. It’s our center that holds the power. Tangle after tangle out there, but empowered from in here, I untangle (and we and you do too) meticulously, determinedly, lovingly, and wisely.

What is it that we are untangling from? It couldn’t be more obvious. Immorals, immoral, the darkest of the immoral root—child rape, child molestation, the killing of life and innocence itself. My dragons are naturally becoming butterflies again. It’s not that one is evil and the other good—the creatures I’m talking about, the creations. It’s all about the person behind the creation. Dragons raise themselves by cold-blooded, reptilian, no mother roots. They are not evil themselves—they had evil done to them.

The end. We wish. We wish that was the end, but evil continues to spread like a disease when child molesters are forgiven, or ignored, or covered up, or passed along in the world. God bless, they’re gone. Oh god damn, there they are again taking sexual advantage of sons left without a father, young women lost and alone and needing jobs, and princesses who are so holy and good, they make father child molesters think that they can turn good themselves by simply hanging out nearby.

How’s the other side doing? Yeah, not too well. Not doing too great. Precious eats subconsciously to cushion her body safe and because food love is relatively harmless, but then she turns on the TV and sees her rapist father, still alive and acting as if he’s a saint. It’s a hellish world. It’s a giant no wonder people didn’t blame people for taking their own lives. Smart people, caring people, true caring.

Suicidals and murderers are different! No we’re not. We are the same at healed heart. The same in understanding, the same in sensing, the same in loving and believing. Just gotta get the Truth out. Interesting how it wasn’t until I became full self-love non-sexual and alone that I spiritually met, faced, and conquered the greatest of human fears and grew stronger. I understand more now about trauma, demons, devils, and healing than I ever have. Lower case “d”’s and lower case “g”’s. A blessing to understand the difference, to see so clearly, and to have so much upper case to believe in.

What do we do now that our feelings aren’t always beautiful and full sun shining feeling (psst, they still usually are)? We LOVE Matt Largess for preparing us for this self-strengthening. We could go sit with a holistic healer and learn about our full spectrum feeling trust that way, but why not just sit with ourselves? I have more to teach you when I learn from within, and so do you. This shedding, releasing, and nucleus strengthening feels a lot like coming home. Suddenly, I’m not tending to the world’s problems in an endless stream manner, where my energy is being mixed and strewn all about, but fortifying real solutions from a whole and earth-rooted stance. The FBI failed me because they fell in love with my humor and beautiful ways. They forgot who they are. They forgot the important not-always-so-good-feeling job they have to do. We’ll remind them. We’ll become so heavy, aware, at home, and unafraid, that we’ll remind them again and again what it is that we all need to see, as individual people and a collective, in order to understand why practically nothing is able to flourish and last business-wise or love-wise for too long now.

We did it! We found the problem. Problems. How sad it wasn’t just one child molester or a few loose in the world. It was many. Just focus on the one who was in your life, Melissa Toni—your biological mother, Mary Beth Toni (maiden name Brosofske). I will, and I won’t. I will, and I won’t because that’s probably what they thought. Don’t worry about everybody else. Don’t worry about Precious, don’t worry about Matt Largess and his sons, don’t worry about Ty Murray who taught you (and us all) so much, nor Autumn nor his brothers. The rest of the world will be fine. I shake my head. No. She gets away, he gets away, they all get away. We all meet them eventually. They latch on and learn from and slowly kill us. They kill what’s beautiful by pretending it’s theirs, but dragons and butterflies, spiritually, raise and create themselves. That’s why we’re indestructible. “You can’t kill what isn’t your creation.” (Quote from the band Thousand Foot Krutch).

Independence is our right. We can’t emphasize that enough. We’re gonna continue to support and defend that, even as we target child molesters (real ones) and let crumble down businesses that are not in alignment with earth healing and genuine love. Do I have all the answers? No. It’s me and a huge multi-level, multi-dimensional, always-learning army. What’s the forefront goal? Eliminate child molesters (real ones). Give an example why. Missy J’s business that I’m sure supports many young females who were out of a stable job in alignment with healing and safety—that is a huge problem in the world right now. But because of the suspected child molester (real one) face of the business, now they’re at risk of losing that job. How about the young male vegan cook in Virginia? Why doesn’t my army fully support the flourishing of his independence? Because, who’s the lady in the back cooking the food? We don’t know if she’s a good mom or not. And how about all the child molester (real ones) who might stroll into the business, meet him, and destroy his love future, you know what I mean? We’ve got a mix of healthy caution and dark-shaded awareness along with real hope and good avenues for making a beautiful life.

Good to get the whole picture. Good to remember too how thankful we are for the real things:

• Thank you independent, just me, safe, solo home. I remember in college, getting my own place and graduating (AKA getting the fuck out of there) was the most exciting prospect of the whole experience.

• Thank you cleanliness and sobriety. Thank you pure connection and seated Truth in that there is nothing from the blurry disconnect I miss.

• Thank you dancing.

• Thank you art.

• Thank you animals and nature.

• Thank you writing.

• Thank you self for being yourself.

• Thank you everybody for defending what is good while standing up—or sitting still with determination—for what is eternally wrong.